New Dawn, New Day

Xanadu Weyr - Star Stones
Here, atop the exposed dome of the geologic monolith that houses the caverns, infirmary, crafters and administration complexes, the view offers a splendid panorama of Xanadu Weyr. To the immediate east is a narrow metallic walkway leading to a column of stone - the natural spire that forms the starstones.

Just beyond, parts of the meadow and ridge can be seen. Directly in front and below is the clearing, flanked by the forest, hatching arena, tavern, clock tower and garden shop. Beyond the trees, glimmers the waters of Caspian Lake and the Sea of Azov, while almost lost to the distance is the coastline of the opposite shore and Black Rock Hold.

Just a few steps to the west looms the tower that is responsible for Xanadu Weyr's shortwave radio communications. Reaching for the skies and lit by blinking red warning lights at night, this area is off limits to dragons landing due to the danger of fouling a wing on the guy wires that support it.

Dawn is a time when not all is quiet in the Weyr but many places still are. There won't be many workers in the archives or even the whole of the administrative wing until a little while later. It makes the beautiful view offered by the Star Stones a particularly quiet retreat as colors begin to paint the sky and turn clouds from mere shadows to visible wisps. It's still mostly dark, but there's enough light not to trip on the stones, enough light to say that the show that is Rukbat rising has begun. There is a sole occupant of the Star Stones this morning. Stefyr's figure is fairly distinct, even in the dark, as he stands, arms crossed over his chest, watching the sky. If one draws close enough to take note, this is a man in need of a bath, the smell of salt and sweat lingering on him. Maybe that's where he'll go next, but for now, he's here. Standing alone, in the nearly dark. It might possibly be the ultimate brood.

So, N'on kinda has this thing where he seeks out high places to watch the view. The clock tower is his favorite haunt, but you really can't beat the Star Stones for a peaceful sunrise breakfast. So he makes his way up the metal walkway bearing a small packet that contains his breakfast, and it isn't until he has already emerged and turned toward his usual place that he realizes he's not alone. He freezes, sends a quick, abortive glance back toward the walkway, then stops. There's certainly no chance he wasn't noticed, since you can't really climb metal stairs without being heard, so he just continues with his intended goal, and posts up at an ideal spot for watching the day begin.

Well, this is awkward. Nothing ruins a good, silent brood faster than the clatter of steps on a metal walkway. Blue eyes are already pulled from the sky to take in the arrival of the greenrider. Stefyr might have been able to ignore having to share his brooding perch with a stranger. The stranger could've been over here and Stefyr could've just gone… over there and resumed his dramatic, legs apart, weight settled, arms crossed over his chest pose. But recognizing the person arriving definitely precludes the possibility of feigning solitude. Tension doubles in shoulders, but his arms fall to his side and he turns to move toward the greenrider. "Hey." It's not a promising beginning, but the blond seems to be trying to work up to finding some right words. If there are any.

N'on's smile has a definite tentative quality to it in the face of Stefyr's brooding, but he's not going to turn down an olive branch, even if it's a little wilted. He starts to unwrap his breakfast packet, revealing a couple of meat pies fresh from the kitchens. They're still warm! He offers one of them to Stefyr, in case he's hungry. Peace offering!

"I'm sorry." So at least Stefyr isn't one of those people who doesn't recognize when an apology is old or waste time tripping over pride to make one. It sounds genuine, if brief. "About yesterday." His eyes drop to the meat pie offering, and he hesitates. The big blond almost never turns down offerings of food, but this morning he shakes his head. "I'll get something after I clean up from sparring." Since it's still dark, it must have been an early practice, since most people would probably wait until there was enough light to see by. Which there is now, but only just enough to make out the greenrider. "There's been a lot going on and…" There's the hesitation, "I'm not making excuses," he jumps sideways to say, "just explaining." And back the other way, "I don't know how to do this." There's a gesture between himself and the greenrider. "I'm making mistakes." So at least he knows it.

N'on shrugs a little when Stefyr doesn't accept the food. The subsequent launching into an apology is met with blinking uncertainty. Once he's recovered from the surprise of receiving the apology, he packs the meat pies back up so he can get them out of his hands and free himself up to 'talk.' "I could see you were upset about something. I'm sorry."

Stefyr watches N'on pack up his breakfast, watches him speak. "This can wait," he offers, indicating the breakfast. "I don't want to keep you from your… routine?" He seems unsure if this is a routine or happenstance run in or what, but there's an element of the puppy with tail between his legs to his demeanor. "I just wanted to apologize. Friends are a new thing for me." The half-smile that briefly appears is more bitter than the feelings that should be in a smile. He glances toward the metal walkway, "Maybe I should go." Then in spite of the words, "It's not…" And he doesn't have words again, but he does have hands going up to push through his hair roughly and come back down.

N'on waves off Stefyr's concern, and stands for a moment with his hands held up, waiting, as he thinks through what he's about to say. Finally, he offers, "You can stay. You can talk, if you want. Or not." He shrugs, smiles, and picks up one of the meat pies to take a bite. He leaves the second where it is, just in case Stefyr changes his mind and decides he'd like some after all.

It's stay. And silence. For a time at least. Probably as long as it takes N'on to finish eating his breakfast - even both if he sorts out that Stefyr's too wrapped up in thoughts to feel concerns of the body. The colors change in the sky to mark the time and give the men a show. It's not as comfortable a silence as they've companionably shared in moments in the past - like on the cliff before their miscommunication, but it's not distinctly uncomfortable, just… hollow, like Stefyr might not really be all there. Finally, he offers a few words, "I keep doing and saying dumb things. I'm sick of it, but I'm not smarter and learning doesn't happen until after I screw it up the first time. I'm worried one of these screw ups will be the last one and I won't get to Stand."

N'on eats his breakfast, perfectly content to munch away in silence. Sometimes you just gotta exist in the same space for a while. He watches the sunrise show until Stefyr speaks, then glances over to acknowledge he's listening. He takes his time with the answer, but then turns toward the Candidate with a signed question, asked with a quizzical, kind smile. "Yesterday, why were you angry?"

"A lot of reasons." Stefyr replies with a sigh and another rough shove through his hair. "I ended up on a stolen boat the other day." He sighs. "I mean, we didn't get blamed for it, because it wasn't our fault, sort of, but I should have thought, should have asked before we were somewhere I couldn't even get to land from if I had wanted to if what we were doing was going to get us in trouble. Lose us candidacy. I mean, it seemed fine in the moment, and then… not. Stupid. I'm an idiot. And then there was what went on with Evangeline during Leirith's flight. And Khavro." He probably means that time N'on caught him almost fighting, mmhm. "And I'm not sleeping well. And I'm not… I'm not. Well." That ends up truncated oddly at the end, and he's defeated by it all. "And then I think… no, I know we don't understand each other about things, and that's… upsetting." He grimaces, "It shouldn't be. I'm sure it's me fucking it up." Has to be, right? He's the one who's new at this friendship thing.

N'on listens to all of this with increasingly round eyes, but before he answers, he grasps at Stefyr's shoulder and gives it a squeeze. After a moment, he pulls away so he can address these problems one at a time. "I know you. You wouldn't steal a boat. Evangeline and the flight are not your fault." He skips right over the thing with Khavro, because he's already addressed that and is perfectly happy to leave it in the past. "Most people don't understand me." He shrugs and gives a rueful little smirk, then adds, "You try more than most."

Blue eyes flick to the hand that squeezes his shoulder, then back to N'on's face, a slight nod only provisionally agreeing regarding the matters presently under discussion. It's the last thing he focuses on. He focuses on the greenrider's face when he takes a bracing breath and confesses quietly, "I'm afraid you will get to know me enough to not find me worth the effort to talk to. To be friends with. I don't want your every thought or anything because there's plenty of mine I don't want to give you or anyone else," and here he is wearing a candidate's knot, people, smart choices in life - Stefyr's got them. "But I don't know if I'd be friends with me, especially with the decisions I've been making lately, and I don't want to lose your friendship because I'm… lacking." He closes his eyes for a long moment before he can bear to open them and receive whatever the shorter man might have to say in answer, if anything.

The expressions on N'on's face shift through a rainbow from worried, to puzzled, then a slow grin. He pulls out his notepad to compose this answer, and passes the carefully-formed note over to Stefyr with a little wink. "I don't have a choice but to think before I talk. If you knew my every thought, you might not want to be friends with me. So we're even." Since Stefyr doesn't seem to want that second meat pie, N'on settles in to eat it, looking out toward the bird's eye view Rukbat has revealed.

Stefyr falls silent for some moments as he looks down at the note. None of the words are that hard so it can't be an issue of basic understanding, or shouldn't be. His lips press together in some words yet unspoken. There are choices here, in how to respond and he appears to be taking some care with that choice. "Does that mean you have to forgive me when I sound as smart as a herdbeast when I open my mouth without thinking?" He inquires. There is a playful edge to the words, even if his whole demeanor is still largely muted. "It seems like it would be fair," he adds with faux conscientiousness.

N'on rolls his eyes at all that. "I already forgave you," he signs. "I was never angry…" He hesitates over the rest, brow furrowing a little as he looks out at the view instead of directly at Stefyr. Finally, reluctantly, he looks back to Stefyr and gives a tight smile. "You will get to know me more," he signs, slowly. "You might not like me. If you don't, that's ok."

Now it's the younger man's turn to touch N'on's shoulder, a brief contact before the big hand falls away. "I respect your boundaries. I don't always do it well, but I… try." His turn to shrug. "I don't think you have to worry about that, or at least not any more than I do?" He raises his brows in rhetorical inquiry. "Maybe I'll like you better and then there'll be a whole different problem." That has a teasing edge, a flash of a smile that doesn't hold any of that earlier bitterness, even if he's not magically better with just this one talk. "I need to go get cleaned up and report for work. I'll see you, N'on." He'll walk backwards, carefully, toward the metal walkway in case the greenrider has any remarks before he departs, turning when he nears it to walk his way back down and in to head for the hot springs.

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